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The Perfect Match

June 29, 2008  - Dale

Is getting married about finding the perfect match for yourself? The person created by God just for you? A kind of unique fit – someone who fits you and only you? And vice versa of course.

And if there is, how to do you know which one it is? Is there some chemistry that lets you both know? Or a sign? Is “falling in love” the proof that is needed? By now some of those who have been married for a while will be muttering something like “romantic nonsense”. Some of the romantics will be rationalising or still in denial.

The questions are romantic questions of course. The question of two people being a “perfect match” is not the same question as to whether they have “true love”.  But the two questions do have something in common. They assume that love and matching come ready-made.

But real love is different to romantic love. Romantic love has a lot to do with attraction and feeling good – seeing the other person as someone who meets our needs or satisfies our desires. Real love has more to do with doing good to the other person – yes - often with passion, feeling and desire. But essentially it is focussed on movement and action toward the other person.  In most marriages the relationship starts with romantic love and develops the other as well (romantic love is usually not enough to sustain a marriage for more than a short time).

It is a bit like the perfect match question. The fitting together takes time (the first 60 years are the hardest they say).  Some people are not fitted for each other of course. But married people realise that while their spouse is certainly the right one for them, the match is approximate. They have to work at fitting together. And the more they work together and give love to each other the better the fit.

It is a bit like the sign Moses was given at the burning bush. ‘When you bring the people back to this mountain – that will be the sign that I sent you.’  The way to know that this person is your perfect match is to be married to them for a very long time. The longer the marriage the more you know.

Which is not much help to single people looking for a wife or husband. I think they have to ask different questions: Is this person a Christian with whom I can grow as a Christian for the rest of my life? Do I think I can appreciate and enjoy their body, mind, character, personality and behaviour  for the rest of my life? Am I a match for them – can I give to and receive something good from them, or will I dominate or be dominated, use or be used? Am I willing to love them, no matter what, for the rest of my life?

Dale

Comments

 "Lord, please show me your perfect choice as my partner"...that is the only answer to all those questions. For sure, the partner He gives us will match even though we will sometime argue but there will always be solution...nice one!

Posted by Myrna on Monday, June 30, 2008 at 07:56:13

The single answer to all those questions asked by single people is pray to the Lord and ask Him His perfect partner for us. Based on experience, the partner God gave us will match us even though arguments will always happen.

Posted by Myrna on Monday, June 30, 2008 at 07:49:29

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